Have you heard that song by Matthew West, called Day One? I LOVE that song! It’s so inspiring to me. It’s my reminder that every day is a fresh new day to do better, be better, love better, have new adventures, etc. etc. etc.
“It’s day one of the best of my life
I’m marching on to the beat of a brand new drum
Yeah, here I come, The future has begun
I think of that song right now as I am fasting again. My goal this time around is 21 days and I am doing it for a plethora of reasons, but the thought of 3 weeks is also terrifying to me. Yes, I do love what fasting brings to my life, but it IS very difficult and at times feels impossible. But do you know what’s so cool about fasting? No matter how hungry I get during the day, or how loud my stomach growls in the evening, when I wake up, every morning is fresh and anew. I never wake up feeling hungry, it’s like a reset… Day One. I think about that as I sit here in Chipotle eating a salad on day 4 of my fast. Yep, I’m telling on myself. This is my journey, my fast, my life and I choose to have this salad. I’ve done so well thus far and today I wasn’t prepared, my fault: I helped a cousin with her daughter’s birthday party this morning and enjoyed the last juice I had prepared for breakfast. I was planning on coming home to make a batch of juices before the party – but ran out of time. So I refilled my water bottle and stayed strong through the party (carnival style party with pizza, cheese sticks, pretzel bits, chicken fingers, popcorn, snow cones, cotton candy, fruit tray, cupcakes, beer,… you get the point). So during the party, I decided I was going to go grocery shopping to get stuff for my juices, but before that, I’d treat myself to a salad, at Chipotle. I brought my laptop to type this post, reflect on this process, enjoy a salad and contemplate this fast.
I really admire healthy people. I admire their strength to maintain a healthy lifestyle, I admire their resolve and the boundaries they set for themselves to get/stay healthy through diet and exercise. As I fast, one of the goals is to break bad habits and create new ones. And as I think about what my new lifestyle will look like once I start eating I think about boundaries. I think about this Chipotle salad. I would normally get a burrito bowl with baraboca meat, all the fixings, and a tortilla on the side. oh and a coke. I LOVE coke and only enjoy it “when I eat out” which really has been a lot these past few months of life transitions. But today I abstained, set limits for myself and literally told myself (in my head) “Just because you CAN doesn’t mean you SHOULD” (you can read about my last fast and my Ephiny post HERE ) So I got a salad, sans tortilla, veggie, no meat, skipped the sour cream and asked for a sprinkle of cheese – small steps but a big deal in my world. As I reflect on this salad, choices and boundaries, I really want to absorb this experience. I am eating slowly, enjoying the flavors, not feeling deprived that I didn’t get the soda or tortilla. I’m still fasting, I’m not throwing in the towel, tomorrow is a fresh new day, Day One (well day 5 really, I’m not starting my count over – it’s a hiccup). I think about the “norm” vs “occasional”. It was normal for me to eat anything I wanted (and I wanted/craved /at times, obsessed about unhealthy foods). This fast is to break that. Start a new normal… and it’ll be much easier after this fast. Let me tell you, after a while without eating – to actually EAT fruits and vegetables is a big treat and so incredibly delicious to slowly, intently and mindfully enjoy. That will be my “norm”, with the occasional treat – setting up (& keeping) those boundaries in my life is imperative to my success. If I ever let unhealthy choices become my normal rather than the occasion – then it’s reboot/reset/fasting time again!
Why am I here eating during my fast? I wasn’t prepared. My fault. I make my own juices, I buy the produce and juice every other day to prepare my juices. Specifically, I’m consuming about 60-80oz of fresh, homemade juice a day and even more water than that! But I didn’t prepare for today. I was busy. I had commitments. I was strong through a very tempting and difficult social situation and made the decision to break the fast. So what am I doing now (after I eat my Chipotle salad- which I’m excited to report made me full after only eating a few bites)? I’m going to Costco to purchase necessities for my fast, as well as premade, cold-pressed juices so I don’t get caught with my pants down again, so to speak.
And so I march on. I’m done with my salad and feeling stronger than ever before. I really created this blog as an outlet, my personal journal and feel so good about what I’ve accomplished and have really learned from this experience. I feel ready for another 17 days and will better prepare myself so I can be successful with this fast, and a continued healthy lifestyle.